How Canadian PM Lyin' Brian Mulroney got rich fighting apartheid

Now that Lyin’ Brian has gone to his reward, we will be endlessly harangued about his principled stand against apartheid in South Africa. And he was indeed a high-profile anti-apartheid activist. When Brian came to power, the South African Krugerrand was by far the world’s most popular investment-grade gold coin. It was one of the most important exports for the SA economy. A few years before Brian ascended the throne, Canada had introduced it’s own investment-grade gold coin, the gold maple leaf coin. It got off to a slow start. It would be a tough uphill slog to capture market share from the Krugerrand. Enter the humble electrician’s son from Baie Comeau, and his principled stand against apartheid! Mulroney was a leading figure in the drive to impose sanctions against the South African economy, including, of course, international sales of the Krugerrand. Sales of Canada’s gold Maple Leaf took off! Oddly enough, after Brian left office, he soon found himself on the board of directors of Barrick Gold, Canada’s premier gold producer! Brian advanced through the corporate governance ranks to become Chair of the Board of Directors, and if I’m not mistaken, remained a “special advisor” to the board until his passing. Isn’t it great to see such a principled politician enjoy a lucrative payday! Mind you, there were also those embarrassing ethical lapses around that Karl-Heinz chappie and his cash-stuffed envelopes... but let's not bring that up now... RIP Mr Mulroney.

Lyin' Brian Mulroney gifted Canada's working class "free trade," and my butt still hurts

The sales pitch went something like this; Yankee money and know-how, Mexican labour, and Canadian resources would invevitably coalesce into a world-beating economic bloc, bringing oodles of prosperity to all of us! Yes indeedy! Sure, we'd lose a few jobs to Mexico, due to their tendency to work for $20 per week instead of our $20 per hour, but experts assured us we'd only lose the shit jobs like manufacturing cars and stuff. Really good high-tech jobs would replace them, because Mexicans are too stupid to do them. Lyin' Brian didn't have to spell out the too-stupid part. It was implied. The only people who never bought it were the shop floor workees in Canadian factories. We knew from the get-go the Mexicans could do anything we could do. They just did it way cheaper. Free trade was the beginning of the end for Canada's working class. Thanks Brian!

Dementia Joe talks imaginary ceasefire while licking ice-cream cone

This is where we’re at in the world of international diplomacy, circa 2024. The Leader of the Free World is taking a moment from his busy schedule of avoiding issues, to visit an ice-cream shop. Some nosey reporter types mistook the ice-cream stop for a press stop and began hurling questions at the Leader of the Free World. Between licks on his cone, the President revealed that he expects a ceasefire in a week. Boy, does Netanyahu have a surprise for him!

Trudeau makes surprise visit to Kyiv to blow more smoke up Zelensky's ass

PM Fluffy made a surprise visit to Ukraine to mark the second anniversary of Russia's full-scale, brutal, unprovoked, barbaric, and full-scale invasion of Ukraine. Did we mention it was a full-scale invasion? As we all know, Putin grew increasingly deranged at the prospect of seeing a thriving liberal democracy flowering next door. He knew once his long-suffering people noticed the pluralist paradise flourishing in the former Soviet satellite state, his days would be numbered. The Russian people would rise up and demand human rights and Pride parades just like they have in Ukraine. Luckily for the Democratic World, the plucky Ukrainians have been putting the run to the Putinist hordes (remember - it was a full-scale invasion) ever since, thanks largely to Canada and our allies providing hundreds of billions in money and materiel, or in Canada's case, billions in promises. Canada has been more than a little light in the materiel department since long before the full-scale invasion, but we do what we can to show our allies that we're a reliable partner in the global struggle between Democracy(good guys) and Authoritarianism(bad guys). To that end, Fluffy and Zelly signed a ten year mutual defence agreement at the weekend. The Canadian side promised aid worth 3 billions in the first year, but did not specify if that was in Canadian dollars or Ukrainian hryvnia. No amounts were committed beyond the first year, just in case. And due to the prudent nature of the Canadian side, our assistance comes as a loan, not a donation. Ukraine should have no trouble repaying once Putin is defeated. Once again Canada proves it has what it takes; a leader who will make empty promises for as long as it takes, and isn't afraid to call Putin names!

Canada "investigating possibility" of aid airdrop to starving Gaza

That’s supposed to be a good news story at CBC. It is intended to reassure readers that Canada is not ignoring the humanitarian catastrophe that has been unfolding in Gaza for almost five months. Alas, we Canadians know there is a vast gulf between our government “investigating possibilities” and actually doing something. After investigating possibilities (2-3 months), a committee will be struck to commence a feasibility study (6-12 months). Then another committee of experts will convene to determine the most viable option(s). No doubt this will require hearings (another 3-6 months,) but before that there will be several months of discussions over whether the hearings should be in camera or public. Following the hearings, our preferred course of action must be sent to parliament for approval. That could easily take another month or more, depending on what other urgent matters are before parliament at that time. Finally, when we get all our humanitarian ducks in a row, possibly in two years time, comes the tough part; getting Israel’s permission to feed the people they are deliberately starving. It’s safe to say anyone in Gaza waiting for Canada’s help will be long dead before it arrives.

Royal Canadian Navy drowns in morass of bureaucratic inertia - zero ships delivered after 13 years

If you follow the comings and goings of our utterly inept and incompetent political class, you’ll be well acquainted with our brand-spankin’ new fleet of warships that have been “in the pipeline” for quite some time now… oh wait… doesn’t seem to be any sign of those ships. In fact, other than Irving wangling another half billion out of the feds recently for “shipyard improvements,” we don’t hear much about the pipeline, let alone the ships. Here’s a story from the archives. Saturday, October 29, 2011 Canada commits 25 billion for new combat ships Minister of National Deference Peter MacKay announced last week that the Irving shipyard in Halifax would be contracted to build the next generation of warships for Canada's navy. As Minister of Deference Mr. Mackay sees his job as being mainly about deferring to the big dogs in Brussels and Washington, and no doubt the big dogs will be pleased with this announcement. After all, it seals our commitment to being able to punch above our weight etc. whenever some dictator in some shithole foreign country who we've supported for forty years gets too big for his britches. And you know how we Canadians like to punch above our weight. It's almost an obsession. But politics aside, it's good news for the lads in the shipyard. I worked on the last generation of warships, at the Irving shipyard in Saint John, and I have to say it's a good gig, in spite of my pacifist leanings. It's good news for the Irvings too. As big-time capitalists go the Irvings are pretty cool. James Irving was the big gun at the Saint John yard back in the day. Used to come in unannounced at the oddest of hours just to see how things were going. One night he shows up on our late shift. One of the boys who'd had a few was a bit irate over having had to install the same set of bulkhead doors three times because the specs kept changing. Got right in Irving's face and gave him a whiskey laced piece of his mind. I thought, well, Buddy's toast. Not so. James Irving was able to overlook the booze-breath because Buddy had some serious concerns about efficiency. That made him Irving's kind of guy. If I was just a bit younger I'd be tempted to head east again.

Lying Jens Stoltenberg claims Ukraine getting F-16s "as early as possible"

Really? We’re at the two year anniversary of this war. The country formerly known as Ukraine is bleeding out in front of the eyes of anyone who cares to look. Mind you, looking ain’t easy if you rely on the typical Western propaganda cartel: CBC/CNN/BBC/Fox, for your news. They're still predicting a Ukrainian victory, if such delusion can be imagined. While I’m no fan of the Bandera-oriented factions put in power by the Washington-organized coup in 2014, I find it outrageous how they’ve been goaded into war with Russia by their American masters, and then left to twist in the wind. What happened to “whatever it takes for as long as it takes?” Did America and her NATO vassals not have what it takes? Or did they deliberately hold back what it takes? The F-16s are a case in point. I recall Ukrainians demonstrating in the streets during the first days of the war, with placards demanding “close the skies!” Two years and half a million dead Ukrainians later, Jens reassures Ukraine we’re working on it… If I were a Ukrainian I’d be pissed off at more than Putin.