Befuddled elderly gentleman can't find lawyer's office to sign will

I had a moment this afternoon when the thought crossed my mind that maybe I'm a little further along the Alzheimer Highway than I realized. One of the great joys of aging is planning for your death. When you're younger you figure why would you give a shit - you're dead! That's been my attitude most of my life, but the closer you get to your inevitable meet-n'-greet with the Grim Reaper, the more I've thought, oh, what the heck, maybe I should avoid leaving a big headache that will aggravate the heirs for years to come, or even longer. So a few months ago, based on queries to locals I know and trust, I made an appointment with a local lawyer whom I'd never met before, and we hashed out a draft last will and testament. A few weeks go by, and I get an email advising me it's ready for review and signing. Great! Much as I resent the entire process, I'm looking forward to getting it out of the way. The signing ceremony was scheduled for 1 pm today. So I pull into the parking lot a good 15 minutes early. I'm pumped! I'm ready to go! I'm finally doing some really important adult stuff that's a little overdue, and I'm feeling good! The parking lot wasn't quite the way I remembered it, but I'd only ever been there once, and didn't pay much attention. Then I went to the back entrance, and that's changed too. Last time, I was welcomed there, and today I'm greeted by a sign asking me to use the front door. Well, that seems a little odd... I go around to the front, and I notice there's no mention of any lawyerly enterprises on the sign at the street... WTF? Am I in the right place? I go into the memory files...two or at most three old red brick office buildings past a low-slung modern building on the corner. The modern building is right on the corner where it should be, but... so I go into the second place past it. The sign mentions a wellness spa and a tattoo parlour, and I realized instantly those were one and the same. There were at least four employees, and as far as I could tell, one client, but clearly this was an up-market tat joint. Everybody had enough piercings none of them coulda gone anywhere near a metal detector, and there was ink as far as the eye could see, and presumably where it couldn't too. I've had a little ink for fifty years and have always had an eye for top-shelf artists, and what I saw was first class. So, I apologize for interupting, and explain that my lawyer's office used to be in that building and would they know where it went, because I have an appointment blah blah blah... All four stop what they're doing and consult amongst one another. These are the sweetest, kindest people in the world, but they all agree there's never been any lawyers in their building. They enquire as to the name of the firm. I can't remember, and a panic attack is starting to move in as I realize I may have been duped by some shady fly-by-night operation... do I at least remember the name of the lawyer? Yes I do! Jennifer! I guess that wasn't quite enough for them to work with, and they seemed genuinely sad they couldn't help this obviously confused wretch who had wandered into their day. I get out and look up and down the street. I definitely remember the low-slung building, and there's no corners like that further west, so I shuffle eastward. By now I'm sweating profusely and just below panic threshold, when I get to the next light. As I push the crosswalk button I realize... there's a low-slung building on the corner opposite... is it possible? Could it be? By the time they let me in the back door at precisely 1 pm I was begining to recover, but I gotta say it gave me a wee fright for fifteen minutes. The old "steel trap" ain't what it used to be...

American pop culture has mocked God for 50 years; God has finally turned His back on America

When I look at the wars that the Nations of Virtue, ie the freedom & democracy loving full-patch members of Western Civ, are at this very moment pursuing, I can't help but wonder what an actual "Just God" might conclude. I can't imagine that the "Just God," be He from the Christian, the Judaic, or the Muslim tradition, could ever, in any way, endorse the mass murder of women and children. Yet our Western Civ refuses to utter the taboo word, GENOCIDE. Let's not lose sight of the fact that Israel is a charter member of the Nations of Virtue club, the "Golden Billion" who get to lord it over the seven billion lesser beings who, truth be told, are getting a little tired of the charade. We are at the cusp of serious shit. All the idiot talk I hear from Washington suggests they still imagine they're winning the war they lost months ago. You have to spend a little time on Fox News every day just to get a sense of what Mafia Don watches, and Holy Mother of God, the Towelheads o' Terror are the absolutely worst evil that has ever been seen in history! Nobody who writes that crap ever explains how or why their evil is any more evil than the evils of Western Civ, but that's the mentality that keeps our warmongering going full-tilt into ultimate disaster. It was former CIA director Mike Pompeo who bragged up the fact Uncle Sam lies and cheats and steals. (As an aside, the fat warmonger is now a skinny warmonger... Ozempic???) Anyway, the point I'm trying to get to, is that if there is such a thing as a "Just God," there's no possible way that Just God could be on the side of Western Civ.

White Supremacy on the march across Canada

Hard on the heels of the nazi takeover of Millarville Alberta last summer, CBC today exposed a white supremacist group in Ontario that is plotting to overthrow the government, deport all non-whites, and set up a thousand year master race with themselves in charge. This was revealed in a confidential report to CBC from the Canadian Anti-Hate Network, the same government funded "NGO" that tipped the CBC to the Millarville scoop. The "Dominion Society," near as I can make out, is a couple dozen middle-age, generally fat guys who like to get together now and then to piss and moan about politics, as is the norm in societies everywhere. I'm guessing they came up with the club idea because it sounded way better when you told your wife you're off to a policy conference, as opposed to you're off to a piss-up with your pals! The leader of this dangerous gang of white supremacist revolutionaries is one Daniel Tyrie, who was obviously thrilled to get his first-ever interview request from CBC, and didn't disappoint! He's clearly hoping for many more. I have a hunch most of his drinking buddies... or "foot soldiers" if you will, may skip future policy meetings. Anyway, the old "far-right threat" to our freedom and democracy continues to be a reliable excuse for our leadership elites to impose ever more fascistic limits on our freedoms and human rights.

What's wrong with this headline?

"Ottawa plans Crown corporation to break defence procurement logjam." Apparently the multiple bureaucracies responsible for spending taxpayer dollars on bombs and bullets and F-35s and German submarines are completely incompetent when it comes to spending money. They can't spend it fast enough due to bureaucratic bottlenecks in the spending pipeline. Fortunately for peace, justice, freedom, democracy, and all the other good stuff Canadian taxpayers relentlessly fight for, the Carney government has announced the creation of a new crown corporation to supervise the spending of tax monies. That's right! We're getting a fresh new level of bureaucracy to whip all those other levels into shape! Not the way I'd handle bureaucratic gridlock, but what the hey, let's give Carney a chance...

For what it's worth

Spent an hour or so last week having a face-to-face with a family friend who's been in the real estate biz forever. I'd requested the sit-down because I'd been thinking about some concerns my mother had brought up, like wouldn't it be a great idea to sell Falling Downs and move to Guelph to be closer to family. Ya, I know my folks have been in the biz forever too, but this gal comes from the other side. Which in no way rules out the possibility she could be in cahoots with my dear Mom! Anyway, due to my various old-fucker-about-to-croak medical issues I've been diagnosed with, there seems to be pressure building that I should slow down, scale back, simplify my life, and move into a wheelchair-accessable abode. I'm quite OK with most of that. What's not to like about slowing down and scaling back? Count me in! But inevitabley, these conversations turn to the what it's worth question, and I gotta say these real estate folks really toss around some impressive numbers. Apparently the joint has gone up 250% in the twenty years since I bought it! I'm a millionaire! Great! I can cash in and trade my hundred acres of peace, quiet, tranquility, and good neighbours for a condo in town! Oh ya baby, I'll get right on that! Or maybe not; not just yet, anyway. And while it's true enough that such a move would provide the second bathroom we lack here at Falling Downs, that hardly seems an adequate incentive to move into town. For what it's worth, I'm content to pee off the porch while gazing at the stars, with the coyote choir providing the sound-track, for as long as I can get to the stoop without a wheelchair ramp!

Did the golden age of rock & roll ever produce any superstars who were NOT drug addicts?

None come to mind. Ted Nugent maybe? But he was only a superstar for maybe a year and a half around the time of the Cat Scratch Fever tour. For the past fifty years his only paying gigs have been at GOP events. The serious superstars, Clapton, Beck, Page, Bowie, Prince, SRV, Steve Earle, MJ, Joe Strummer, Joe Perry, Keith... and you could pretty much work your way through the music industry "A" list and well into the B,C, and D lists and never find a somebody not tainted with the addiction curse. Don't get me wrong. I don't think there's anything new under the sun about musically inclined folks wanting to get high. Then again, I'm living proof that getting high will not in and of itself kickstart your music career. I can only hope Liebe Mutti never sees this post, but maybe that's because I was never sufficiently addicted! I never really got beyond pot and beer, whereas successful musicians in the golden age started with heroin and took it from there. Maybe that's why most of them are dead and I'm not!

Pot-addled hillbilly goes global

Back in March I noted in a post that the View from Falling Downs had passed 3 million views, and it had taken 15 years to get there. Six months later, it's racked up another 3 million. Not bad numbers for a blog with three followers and a warning for readers with every post! Somebody suggested maybe that's why people read it. If it's worth censoring, maybe it's worth reading! Anyway, pretty sure half a million views per month ain't anywhere near Lambo country, and besides, I'd have to get onside with those community standards to monetize, which prospect holds no appeal for me. The pot-addled hillbilly has definitely gone global though. Check out the top ten audiences over these six months, ranked in order: USA, Brazil, Singapore, France, Bangladesh, Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Vietnam, and "other." That last category makes up over half (1.64 million, to be precise). The pot-addled hillbilly is everywhere!