Why Ted Nugent should fire up a fattie

Don't get me wrong. I love Ted. He's one of the finest rock-and-roll guitarists who ever lived. As far as I'm concerned he's right up there with  Jeff Beck and Eric Clapton and Jimmy Page.

In fact, I think one reason he has never gotten his due as a musician is because he goes so far out of his way to push the envelope of political incorrectitude.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's an envelope I often try to push in my own way.

And I know that in his heart Ted is a sportsman when it comes to his hunting activities. Just today he was Tweeting from his deer-sit where's he's spending Christmas Eve with a crossbow.

That's a far cry from sitting in that deer-sit holding a Bushmaster with a 30 round clip.

I know Ted would correct me. That's not a clip; it's a "magazine."

So we know that Ted is, after all and above all, a true sportsman.

But when a toff like Piers Morgan gets him on TV Ted doesn't do himself any favors. What the hell is up with that "suck on my machine gun" stuff?

Ted, get a grip; that just makes you sound like a weirdo.

That's why you should fire one up now and then, Ted. It'll mellow you out a bit. In fact, if you want to head up this way I can hook you up with the coyote hunters around here. Nobody's got a 30 round clip, but they're providing an essential public service to the local farm economy.

And they bag dozens of coyotes every winter.

I can hook you up with some primo Puslinch red-hair too. It does a great job taking the edge off.

Hell, you won't even miss that 30 round clip.