The odious links between Boko Haram and the Nigerian military

You have to go out of your way a little bit to find them, but there's no shortage of stories like this one claiming a close relationship between Boko Haram and elements within the Nigerian military.

This should not come as a complete surprise. In many areas of rural Nigeria, the dollar-a-day folks fear the state at least as much as they fear the militants. And don't forget, the country has spent more time under military dictatorship than under an elected government. Democracy is more of a decorative façade than than an institution.

The corrupt buffoon running for re-election is spending millions on an American PR firm to burnish his image - not among the voters in Nigeria, but with his pals in the West. Is it a coincidence that America is threatening greater involvement in Nigeria just before the election?

I think not.

Bad News for Africa; US to step up war on Boko Haram

The main reason that would be bad news is because the USA has a horrific record of fucking up everything they touch.

There's a whole bunch of ancillary reasons too, but I'll let you figure those out.

Hint; think slavery.

But, be that as it may be, there's a lot of folks figure Boko Haram are an American problem.

They're not. Boko Haram are a West Africa problem, not a Nebraska problem. America needs to step away, not step in.

Blaze a doobie, not a Uzi...

That's the last word on the subject from the pacifists here at Falling Downs.

In the tradition of Menno Simons, we're totally anti-war and anti-violence. You don't pick up your Uzi till the intruder poses an immediate threat.

Actually, Simons would have held off the trigger and just let the intruder take his stuff...

Which is better than taking a life.

Besides, if you don't own anything worth stealing, the chances of an intruder posing an immediate threat are slim indeed.

That's why we're a little puzzled by our government's enthusiasm for nabbing wannabe jihadists who are heading off to fight Assad. They got three guys in Ottawa this past week on exactly that charge.

Now, had we permitted their Syrian adventure, this story foretells their likely fate. Six Canadian jihadis dead in the last couple of months. In Syria.

That beats the hell outta arresting them at the airport on their way to glory, which just means they'll be clogging up the court system at vast public expense, indefinitely!

Those young idealists, if they wanna go to Syria to fight Assad, let 'em go!

Besides, they're just heading off to do their small part to complete the Harper-Baird mission of seeing Assad out the door. Why are we stopping them?

And also, (and we're in double-bonus territory here), once they're killed over there, we don't have to worry about them coming home and causing havoc here.

That's what's known as a "win-win," my friends!

The only bigger win would be if those guys would just forget the glory and focus on the doobie in the first place...

That would save a lot of folks a lot of grief!

Canada pays $5 millions baksheesh to grease release of Mohamed Fahmy from Cairo prison

While Foreign Minister John Baird's government jet was taxiing down the runway, destination Cairo, his department issued a press release announcing a surprise five million dollar gift for an obscure youth employment project in Egypt!

Expect to hear some very good news about Fahmy soon!

Charlie Hebdo gives master class in how to profit from tragedy

What a difference a week makes!

A week ago Charlie Hebdo was a failing novelty comic with a print run of 50,000 or less.

This week, the print run is for 3,000,000!

In the interim, Charlie Hebdo managed to become a centrepiece, indeed the central focus, in a global debate about "free expression" and "freedom of speech."

A whole bunch of leaders from a whole bunch of places that normally give short shrift to freedom of speech were happy to drop everything to make a Paris photo-op!

Every single one of them was angling for the perfect photo-op to sell themselves to their domestic audience. Netanyahu gave the master class at that break-out session.

Charlie Hebdo is France's answer to the National Lampoon, forty years late and without the redeeming humour.

But it is now a title that will forever be a "freedom of expression" icon, a fact that is undeserved and unfortunate.

Relentlessly mocking the religion of France's underclass may indeed be an exercise in freedom of speech, but to what end?

I think a lot of those "I am Charlie" folks never actually thought it through.

Charlie Hebdo was a racist anti-Islamic propaganda tool, which is why 40 world leaders were able to drop everything and find their way to Paris at a moment's notice.

And the cover of this latest print run of 3,000,000 is specifically designed to stir up more controversy.

With a bit of luck, there will be a print run of fifty millions next week!

Will Haaretz be the next Charlie Hebdo?

The vaguely leftish Israeli newpaper Haaretz has got a whole whack of columnists gunning to become front page news by running afoul of right-wing public sentiment in Israel.

Not to mention further inflaming the "Netanyahu is the greatest leader since Moses" clique.

That should do it!

Pot-addled hillbilly writes Christmas card, finds money to buy stamp!

Holy shit!

For the first time in fifty years I got a Christmas card from my old pal Kipling!

I do believe the dude is moving into geriatric sentimentality!

I'm feeling kinda bad. In the first place, while I've often thought about it, I've never actually sent out a Christmas card in my life. Keeping the social end of things up to civilized standards has never been my department, and I therefore rely on the partner of the day to take care of these matters.

I would have thought the same rules obtain in Kipling's house. They have for fifty years!

Wonder what's gone wrong?

Senility is setting in?

In the second place, I'm feeling bad because I only picked up that Season's greeting three weeks post-Xmas. Ya, we're a long ways from the Post Office here at Falling Downs, and once or twice a month is more than enough contact with the outside world.

Nevertheless, I was touched by the generous gesture of my old pal sending a Christmas greeting.

We've seen a lot of bridges submerged beneath the waters of progress, we have.

When those bouncers at The Manor chased me three miles up Waterloo Avenue one drunken night, Kipling was there.

Well, not exactly; he was back at The Manor enjoying his next lap dance...

When we trashed that joint in Fergus, and I had to single-handedly fight off the bouncers, Kipling was there.

Well, not exactly. He was already in the car twisting one up...

When my Dart GTS was steaming south on the Hanlon at an honest 150 mph, on bald tires, Kipling was there, and I remember that because that was the exact moment his girlfriend chose to claw his eyes out over some imagined indiscretion of his with some floozy from The Manor...

Hey, you'd remember that too if it was you hanging on to the steering wheel at 150 mph while a not-too-happy couple was sorting out their marital discords with fisticuffs right next to ya!

At 150 mph...

And he was there when that biker-cum-trucker forced me onto the running board of his Peterbilt for a piss on the 402 highway.

Well, not exactly "there," but inside the cab yucking it up with the driver at the expense of the poor schmuck stuck on the running board with his wang waving in the freezing 70 mph breeze...

Ya, it's been a lot of water under the bridge and a lot of bridges under water...

Thanks for the Christmas card, pal!