Crisis on County Road 20: PIG ON ROAD

The Farm Manager is dialed into the local internet community via Facebook and all that shit. By "local" I mean within a two mile radius or so. A two mile radius is all country people. Some of them original farm homesteaders, most of us just people who'd rather live in the country. I'm not cut out for city life. You live cheek by jowl and everybody's up your ass, and why would any sane person spend a million on a luxury townhouse with luxury vinyl plank flooring when they could have a hundred acres and a hundred year old farm house instead? With original maple floors. And you'll never have to smell your neighbor's farts. But I digress. Tonight the word went out on the aforementioned Facebook community that there was a pig loose on the road. Right in front of my house. Within five minutes there was cars gathered on the road in front of my house, and up the driveway. The emergency response team of neighbours soon had the pig on a leash, and piggy was heading home to his owners, who, at the least, owe the neighbourhood a community pig roast.