Trump-Zellensky and the Angels of Death

I’m pretty sure the entire script for Trump 2.0 is coming out of Dana White’s WWE writer’s workshops. If you can get your mind around that, it explains a lot of otherwise inexplicable shit. Like how a scene that was cut from Godfather III showed up at the Pope’s funeral. Everybody knows that’s how history works. The protagonists sit down alone, and hammer out the future mano a mano. The future of Crimea is Russian. The future of Odessa is Russian too. Unless… As the Great Men of History shape the future there in the Vatican, it’s just Trump and Zelly and some random dudes in swishy floor-length black gowns. Those are the angels! Alas, not all of the angels are working in the employ of Heaven. In fact, there is reason to believe that at least some of them are Putin loyalists. Not sure how Dana’s people will handle that plot twist. Remember in that infamous beat-down in the Oval Office how JD and DJ were tag-teaming Zelly with the “you ain’t got no cards” mantra? Today Trump was admitting he doesn’t have any either. Which leaves the Free World with a stark choice. Do we admit defeat? Or do we make a deal with Putin and call it victory?

Doug Ford, the mouth that roared

Did anyone else figure that brou-ha-ha in the Oval Office last Friday looked suspiciously like it might have been scripted by Dana White? Think about it. Don and Dana are pals from way back. Dana’s got the secret sauce that can get the rubes to cheer for… whoever he wants them to cheer for! That’s why I worry about Doug Ford. Doug is Preem of my province. He recently pissed away $180 millions to hold an unnecessary election so he could have a strong mandate to take on Trump. For all those millions, his party gained one solitary seat. I’m surprised he got as much support as he did. At the onset of this unnecessary campaign, he announced he had a plan to ensure every Ontarian had a doctor within four years. I thought, hey Doug, you’ve already been Preem for seven years, why the fuck don’t we have doctors already? But you know politics… I can see Dana’s scriptwriters penciling in Trump’s next victim after Zelly. Doug Ford, the mouth that roared.

Random insights from the stoop

Did you see where our FM Joly made a surprise kissy-face visit to China? All of a sudden we’re trying to forge better relations? Looks to me like the commies aren’t content to meddle in our politics at the local constituency level; no, they’re trying to manipulate the upper echelon of the Liberal Party! How does that jibe with the gird-your-loins-for-war-with-China mantra that’s been coming out of Official Ottawa for about the last ten years? It doesn’t! That’s just one of the many puzzles I try to puzzle out as I while away the hours on the stoop. It was a good day for watching the buzzards soar. Just the right combination of sunshine and breeze that these amazing creatures could literally soar for hours without flapping their wings. The Zen of buzzard watching. Last night I watched the closing ceremonies of the RNC convention in Milwaukee. That’s when they bring out the heavy hitters. Kid Rock. Dana White. Hulk Hogan. The Orange Ogre himself for the grand finale. The entire spectacle proved yet again my theory that the more remote actual democracy becomes, the greater the importance of Democracy Theatre! And next week will provide a bonanza of food for thought; the Greatest Leader since Moses will arrive in Washington to address the US congress, where he will be treated to multiple standing ovations. That’s hilarious, considering everybody from the far right to the far left hates his guts in Israel. Democracy is a bitch! But I digress… back to the stoop. Once in awhile there’s some traffic passing by. Sometimes it’s a $750,000 John Deere towing another half-million combo of seed-drill and chemical tanks. The big cash-croppers like to bathe their crops in chemicals from seeding to harvest. What freaks me out is how often the kid piloting that train is looking at his cellphone. Other times it just the local youngsters, driving solo to their jobs at the stone quarries in their V8 pickup trucks. You’d think they’d at least car pool. Here’s another mystery. Why do some people who ride Harleys insist on having loud stereos? I’ve always loved the Harley sound. It’s music in its own right. Tonight a guy comes roaring along with CCR blasting so loud coming around the bend I heard John Fogarty before I heard the bike! That’s just not right! Some things just shouldn’t go together. I like getting mellow with a doobie and a beer. I like scenic drives in the countryside. But putting them together wrecks both experiences… and possibly wrecks your car too. So, keep life simple, is my advice. Count your blessings, not your grievances.