Royal Canadian Navy announces this month's victory in War on Drugs

Here it is.

Six hundred kilos of cocaine will never blight the playgrounds of Seattle and Vancouver. Not quite as glorious a triumph as last month, when the RCN was chuffed to announce its role in the seizure of 5200 kilos of cocaine.

My understanding is that all this drug interdiction work has no significant impact on the availability of drugs. At best, it works as a price-support mechanism. Is this a reasonable allocation of Canada's limited financial resources?

Here's a suggestion. Let's bring HMCS Whitehorse and the rest of the fleet back to Canada. Instead of chasing phantom drug ships, let them crack down on freighters dumping toxic sludge in English Bay.

Canadian Navy bans booze

In an apparent attempt to cement their reputations as the Milquetoasts of the High Seas, RCN brass has decreed that henceforth booze will not be available shipboard while at sea.

The reason?

Last summer, while the HMCS Whitehorse was not at sea, but tied up in San Diego, three of the laddies got involved in some shit-faced assholery ashore.

Like that's the first time that's happened in the history of seafaring!

Such a shameful disgrace demands serious repercussions, and the knobs in the control room have come up with a brilliant policy that is guaranteed to put an end to drunken shore-leave shenanigans once and for all...

Ban booze while at sea!

Ya, I don't get the connection either... I guess once you've been to officer training you are privy to a higher level of logic that simply eludes the rest of us.