Another thing that sucks about getting old; every time you hear water running, you have to pee

If I run the tap to clean up a few dishes, it's guaranteed that if there's more than two dishes I gotta take a bathroom break before I'm done.

And it's not just water.

I can't stop at the self-serve gas station without being overcome with an enormous urge for an immediate wizz.

But here's the crazy thing.

Just last week I filled up at the PetroCan on the east side. I was heading to Guelph. I figured I'd pop into the Timmies up the way to use the facility.

That's two minutes away. Wonder be, by the time I got there, I didn't have to go!

In fact, I got all the way down to the Wellington Road 6 turn-off, an hour away, before I actually had to pull off the road.

Which makes me think it's safe to defer the call of nature a bit as long as you have something else to focus on. 

And if you wet your car seat, don't blame me.

You obviously weren't focusing hard enough.

The torists are back

Yes, I know they are properly "tourists," but in these parts that's pronounced tor-ists.

Torists are the folks who have million-dollar summer shacks on the Bruce. That would be the Bruce Peninsula, if you're not from around here.

You can have a leisurely breakfast at a window seat in the Top Notch and watch them roll by all day long. Range Rovers and BMWs and a never-ending caravan of $80,000 pick-ups pulling Sea-doos and ATVs and BBQs and summer fun accessories of every description.

They clog up the Timmies, make the Foodland parking lot into a nightmare, and hog all the good seats in the local dining establishments.

But they're more than welcome.

Our new Foodland was built and stocked with the affluent summer crowd in mind. They're not carrying Sambal Oelek chili paste and Kitchen of Love Spicy Quinoa for the benefit of the locals, I can assure you of that.

Couple of things you should know about Wiarton. They tore down a school to build that Timmies. Speaks to our priorities around here.

Also, right up until the sea lamprey found its way into the Great Lakes almost a hundred years ago, Wiarton was a major commercial fishing hub. Wiarton's population was higher a hundred years ago than it is today.

Up until very recently, that fact translated into very reasonable real estate prices. That's changing fast.

The Muskokas are pretty much built out, but you can still get quality Georgian Bay waterfront on the Bruce for well under a million. And once you factor in the inevitable traffic jam on the 400 heading out of town on the Friday of a long weekend, we're really not any farther away from Toronto than is Lake Joe.

So forget Lake Joseph and come take a look at the Bruce.