The tyranny of geography dictates that Canada remains closer to USA than to the EU for the foreseeable future

While it's certainly entertaining, in a morbid sort of way, to see Empress of Europa Ursula and PM Carney flail about looking for reasons to cinch up their so-called relationship, let's not lose sight of the fact that this flailing is 100% due to the abdication of their overseers in DC from their tradtional Big Boss role. Both the Canadian and the EU elites are entirely at a loss now that the preemminence of their master has been cast into doubt by the undeniable reality that the most powerful military the world has ever seen is having its ass shredded and handed back to it by the Towelheads 'o Terror in Iran and those primitives in that gas-station with nukes who happen to have not only the world's biggest atom-bomb arsenal, but at least a twenty-year lead in the missile technology to deliver it! Why it makes any sense whatsoever to suck up to the EU is beyond my comprehension, but our mainstream media is all-aboard for closer ties. They generally avoid mentioning that our prospective besties are hyper-horny for a hot war with Putin. They also avoid any discussion of the EU exercising veto power over all foreign policy decisions in member states. A 'democratic' institution it certainly is not! Not only that, but a close reading of debate in the E3 reveals that all the EU Big Dogs are desperate to bring USA into their forthcoming war. That's because they already know without American muscle they're just a bunch of big-talking dorkshits. What they haven't figured out yet is that American muscle ain't what it used to be. The adversaries are on their 3rd or 4th generation of hypersonic missiles, whereas the US is eagerly anticipating their first successful prototype. That's because for the last fifty years the brightest minds in America have been discovering new genders, while the brightest minds in Iran, China, and Russia, have been discovering new ways to make missiles fly faster. I think their state-of-the-art Avangard is well over mach 20! But don't worry... once we figure it out our superior intelligence and industrial capacity and all-round Yankee derring-do will close that missile tech gap in no time and leave those freedom-hating ragheads and commies in our dust!