Boats

I noticed the other day that somebody has a 52 foot SeaRay overwintering in the yard at the Wiarton Marina.

That's a million dollar boat.

From time to time, when me and the Farm Manager are feeling optimistic, we'll discuss the possibility of buying a boat. Not a million dollar boat, but enough boat to afford a three or four weeks cruise through the North Channel and back.

Maybe even enough boat to make a summer of it and cruise to Chicago and back. You can do that from the Wiarton Marina.

Just for fun I read up on the specs of that SeaRay. Twin 660 Cummins diesels. At optimum cruising speed she sucks back 35 gallons per hour. That's in the neighborhood of $300 per hour... and you're gonna run her through the North Channel?

For two weeks?

Maybe not.

That's crazy money!

Hell, for $300 an hour you can almost hire a lawyer! What do you want to do with the rest of your life - pay lawyers or cruise the North Channel?

There are ways to pare the bills, of course. When me and Junior were waiting in line to pay the extravagant entry fee to view the classic cars at the Cobble Beach Concours last year, there was a elderly gentleman a couple of places behind us having the most script-worthy conversation on his cell phone.

"Ya, how ya doin'... did ya hear xxx checked out the other night?... ya, fer fucks sakes... only turned 70 last year... had a 23 year old in his bed!... ya, died with a smile on his face, but listen, he has a 47 foot Chrissie up in Lake Simcoe, and listen to this; had brand new Detroit's installed last year... ya she's a beauty... ya, I know, but he spent a hundred grand on the diesels!... and she was appraised at... but I've talked to the executor, and I think you can probably get her for 25, maybe even 20."

Hmm...

I was tempted to put a second mortgage on Falling Downs and scoop up that 47 Chrissie.

Alas, twin Detroits are still gonna run into hundreds per hour. Unless you idle along on one motor. Which would give "floating cottage" a whole new meaning. You'd be drifting through the North Channel at about the same pace that waterfront erosion is pulling all those waterfront properties into the sea.

So for the time being, we're sticking to small craft cruising here at Falling Downs. If you're anywhere along the shore of the North Channel next summer, and you see a 14 foot Lund putting by, loaded down with camping gear and a couple of hounds, that'll be me.

At least we won't have to wait for the bridge to open in Little Current.

Free boats

You can get your free boat right here.

You can get a 40 foot Chris Craft for free. But you'll spend thousands of hours and thousands of dollars before you're in the water.

That's why the owners of these boats are giving them away. They no longer have the time or the money.

Before long, you too will realize you don't have the time or the money.

To me the entire concept of "free boats" says something sad about the American Dream.

Back in the dark ages of the mid 20th century, assembly-line workers in Detroit were buying Chris Crafts.

Shop stewards and Foremen and the trades guys had cottages or hunt camps upstate or in Canada. In addition to their Chris Crafts.

They don't anymore.