"You sh!t in a bag and threw it out the window"

I was sitting in the waiting room at the dentist office the other day. One of the abiding absurdities of the current era is how you can't get a haircut, but you can go to the dentist and have one of the gals spend an hour playing in your saliva while cleaning your teeth.

There's an old guy, masked and socially distanced, sitting across from me. I don't get out much anymore, so I seize any opportunity to strike up a conversation.

Turns out Buddy is a semi-retired trucker, well into his seventies. Still runs a load of rocks out of Wiarton two or three times a week to supplement his OAS and CPP stipends. 

We get to chatting about how far you can go on a tank of gas. He used to drive for an outfit called Quik-as-Air. Their calling card was they could get Toronto mail to Vancouver in the same 36 hours you got when you paid the extra for "air mail."

And they did.

Their Freightliner cab-overs, kitted out with max tankage, could literally run from Toronto to Vancouver without ever stopping.

Not even once.

Not for anything...

I'm taking this in. I get that there's two drivers and you spell off, but... don't you have to take a crap once in awhile?

Nah... you just shit in a bag and throw it out the window.