How to waste tax-payer money

A couple of weeks ago we got notice from the township that they'd be fixing up our culvert that sends the waters of the Indian Creek under Concession 20 and on into Bass Lake and the Indian River. Not that we'd ever noticed anything wrong with that culvert. We've been here eight or nine years and that culvert seems to work just fine. In fact, I walk the hounds across that bridge/culvert twice a day, and it's always seemed OK to me.

But, I'm not an engineer, so what the fuck, you gotta give the experts the benefit of the doubt.

So today the job started. We've got rental traffic lights at each end of the work zone. That in itself is hilarious, because you can clearly see across the fifty foot work zone from either end. All they needed was a "yield to oncoming traffic" sign at either end of the work zone. Instead, they rented traffic lights for either end... on a road that might have a hundred vehicles pass by on a busy day.

It get's better. At 7:30 this evening we heard a generator kick in. It was the generator for the construction lights. Yup, the night crew needs their lights! A good hour and a half before sun-set.

Near as we can tell, the day crew knocked off at five o'clock, and there is no night crew. As I write these words it's after ten o'clock, the lights are a-blaze on our wee bridge, and there is no fucking night crew in sight...

WTF?

Now I'm not blaming the lads on the county bridge crew. Those are just regular folks doing their jobs. But I could, were I consulted, point out a lot of places in this county where their endeavours are more earnestly required than here at Falling Downs.

At this time of night we have about one or two cars per hour coming down the road. We don't need two portable traffic signals and a generator-run bevy of construction lights to manage all this non-activity.

Get the fuck outta here!

Porsches and Ferraris at Falling Downs

I was chilling on the front stoop with the Farm Manager this evening, when I saw something slinky and red coming round the S bends...

Holy shit, a Ferrari Testa Rossa! On Con 20 in Grey County!

How the fuck does that happen?

Well, let me tell you how it happens.

Up here in the upper reaches of Grey County, on Concession Road 20, we don't normally see Ferraris.

In fact, we don't see much of anything. Me and the Farm Manager can sit on the front stoop for three hours in an evening and all that goes by is a couple of cars, a few pick-up trucks, and a tractor or two.

But since the folks down the road at the Cobble Beach golf course started up this Concours shit last year, that's changed.

Last weekend we had heavy duty Porsche caravans snaking through the S bends every couple of hours. I'm talking about a convoy of 911s whistling past the farm at a "brisk" pace. Seems the Porsche people had a couple of trailer loads of new 911s at the Cobble Beach Concours, and I'm guessing that these convoys were test drives for media folks or prospective clients.

I don't fit into either of those categories.

But I did find out an interesting fact not too long ago. Seems that when the township first surveyed these parts, they forgot to register title for the bit of Concession 20 that cuts through the middle of my farm.

That would be the S-bends.

In other words, I own the road.

Ya, the Porsche guys may think they own the road. Buddy in his Testa Rossa no doubt thinks he owns the road too...

Hey folks... I actually own the road! Literally! For real!

I'm putting in a toll both in time for next year's Cobble Beach Concours.

So here's a heads up to all you fancy-pants Porsche and Ferrari types; if you want to pass by my stretch of Concession 20, I'll have a turn at the wheel of your car!