Pitch for new Netflix series... this one's a winner!

Had this brainwave, not sure where it came from, but outta the blue, I said to the Farm Manager; "you know what would make a good show?" I figure I'd bounce it off her on account she watches Netflix all the time, whereas I rarely get past Al Jazeera and Jay Leno's Garage. "Follow the adventures of a guy who's coming to terms with mortality. You know; one foot on a banana peel an the other foot on the gas as he's steering that Dodge Hellcat down the Alzheimer Highway at 200mph. You could follow him through life as he grapples with one existential crisis after another. The solutions are always readily at hand by he never recognizes them. Instead, he is constantly forced to MacGyver his way out of calamities largely of his own makeing." Yup, I think that could be a winner all right! I'm a planner, not a doer, so I'm not looking for a starring role or anything. But I do have quite a range of story ideas, and could be persuaded to take a consulting role.

Good news and bad news

The good news is that Falling Downs is now a waterfront property. I could put the canoe in and paddle through the marsh across the way clear down to Bass Lake, 500 yards distant.

We're also waterview. When you can see the sun glinting off Indian Creek enough that you gotta worry about the basement, you're leaking out of "good news" territory.

Checked the basement a few minutes ago...

Good news!

No sign of leakage!

We're still in the good news zone.


In a bout of positivity around a year or two ago, or maybe three or four, I agreed with the Farm Manager that we didn't really need cable anymore. After all, she just livestreams Netflix 24/7, and I'm sick of watching pointless NASCAR races every Sunday afternoon anyway.

Who needs Bell?

Who needs Rogers?

Got to admit that call got me a few brownie points at the time...


But that was then, and this is now!

Now, both the Raptors and the Leafs are in the playoffs! Like, right now!

What was I thinking?!

So I'm stuck trying to find a live feed for those games on one of those betting websites, with mixed results. It's kinda sorta working... I just saw Toronto go up 4-3 on a shorthander.

And I can see the Raps are up by one.

Go Raptors!

Go Bruins!

Retirement planning

From time to time the Farm Manager comes up with a plan to pack in this old farm and "retire" to the city. That's because four-fifths of the Juniors are in the general neighbourhood and we'd get to see them more often.

Now, I figure we'd get to see them more often if they bothered to come up here more often, but what the hell, the FM has a point. They're young folks with busy lives and we're old people with nothing better to do than six hours of driving every time we want to have a two hour visit with any one of them.

Ergo, we should sell the farm and move to the city.

And do what?

We've done the math. Things would be tight. We don't want to spend our golden years having to choose between the Netflix subscription and another bottle of wine.

So we're gonna have to work. The FM came up with the perfect scenario; she could get a part time gig at the liquor store, and I could get a part time gig at a marijuana dispensary.

Ya right... how long do you imagine that scenario is gonna last?

Besides, I see other issues around moving to the city. For one thing, I've never been completely domesticated. Out here at Falling Downs, when nature calls, no worries!

I just take a piss off the front porch!

How many times do you figure I'll be pissing off my tenth floor balcony on Yonge Street before people start to talk? And you know where that's gonna go...

Ya, you'll be reading my name in the Toronto Sun, that's where.


No thanks.

Ottawa outsources culture to Netflix

Great idea!

After all, better Netflix than the wankers at CBC.

And don't forget Netflix is private sector, so they can do everything better anyways.

The record shows Netflix knows how to turn a dollar.

Or at least, how to spend a dollar.

Good enough!

Don't despair, though.

"Culture" ain't all it's cracked up to be.


On the other hand, one must be alert to the threat of Netflix and CBC working as a combine. Maybe they are secretly in cahoots?

And what if the both of them are secretly in cahoots with the Trudeaunistas who have been running roughshod over Ottawa these last couple of years?

I've become a Netflix widower

A couple months ago the Farm Manager started this Netflix nonsense. She could download damned near everything that's ever been recorded, and watch it at her leisure

Her "leisure" now takes up pretty much all her waking hours. Apparently there are still 145 episodes of some British crime drama that she needs to catch up on.

Because it's just that great!

And there are hundreds of other British dramas waiting for her after that.... and then we have the Belgian, Dutch, German, and assorted other dramas that are probably really really great and deserve watching.

I personally have not seen any episodes of that crime drama, nor do I have any desire to see any episodes of that crime drama or any other wares available to me on Netflix.

 I thought my life was more or less complete without it...

Apparently not.

Reconnecting with the FM may require me to get the Netflix tattoo.