They've got POTUS, we've got POTHEAD

That's short for Pierre's Offspring The Hottie Elected As Dictator, in case you're wondering.

So how's POTHEAD doing these first few months?

Too soon to tell in my books. I certainly liked that "hey, let's make a guy with a turban Minister of Defence" gambit, but that could have been a deke for all I know. Maybe the turban guy is gonna make the Harper crew sorry they didn't shove him in there back when Mackay was fucking up the file.

Time will tell...

Speaking of which, it seems that the "biggest win in Canadian export history" is coming back to bite the new government. That was the sale of 5,000 armored cars out of General Dynamics London Ontario plant which was announced two years ago. At the time, the mainstream media were up and down about this. The business pages were clapping so hard their hands fell off. Among the editorializers you saw even in those early days some concerns about the appalling human rights record of Saudi Arabia.

Well, now that POTHEAD is parked in the big chair, there's a clamour rising that he should cancel the deal. This is already way louder than any calls that arose two years ago not to do the deal in the first place.

POTHEAD needs to take a deep breath and ignore those braying imbeciles. The think tank here at Falling Downs spelled it out way back when the deal was first announced.

Those 5,000 armored cars are no threat to human rights in Saudi Arabia. In fact, they are a giant step forward. Those armored vehicles will be used to transport the Bangladeshi guest workers to the beach or to the border, wherever they wish to go. Not to mention giving the regulars in Riyadh's underground gay scene a safe ride home at the end of the evening...

So stand tall, POTHEAD; don't let those media hucksters talk you into cancelling this deal.

After all, 3,000 Canadian jobs depend on it.

Fried chicken and cigarettes

I was in Owen Sound today, and today being Tuesday, I couldn't resist popping into the KFC for a "Tuesday Special."

I really should know better. That particular KFC is famous for its high employee turnover. That can only mean one thing; they're not particularly good to their staff. They're not particularly good to their chickens either, and I feel bad about that, but by God, I'm willing to overlook my principles once in a while for a taste of the Colonel's fried chicken.

And even though I've been enjoying it for 60 years, the Farm Manager has put fried chicken on the blacklist, not on account of how they treat their workers or their chickens, but because greasy fried chicken is allegedly not healthy.

But she's back at the farm and I know Boomer and Lucy aren't gonna spill the beans! This is one of our little indulgences, like those smoked sausages from Sullivan's Butcher Shop when we're in Wiarton (motto; "our meat can't be beat!")

I get to quench my fried chicken craving, the hounds enjoy the scraps, and the FM never needs to know!

So while I'm standing there waiting for my Tuesday Special, I mention to the teens behind the counter that the Public Health Unit is on the hunt for a few keen teen employees. This I suppose is the good deed that assuages my conscience about stopping here in the first place. If they work at KFC they're probably job hunting on the side, and I'm sure the Public Health Unit has gotta be a pretty good gig.

As near as I can tell, they're sort of a "health propaganda" unit. Led by the intrepid $350,000 a year Dr. Hazel Lynn, they berate the locals regularly over the fact that we're fatter than average, smoke more, and drink too much. Beyond that they're pretty much limited to handing out free condoms at the high schools and trying to drive Michael Schmidt, the satan-worshipping communist unpasteurized milk purveyor, out of business.

Why would the Public Health Unit be recruiting teens! Here's why; they're looking for Tobacco Test Shoppers! Yup, those kids will make out like bandits instead of having to bust their butts at KFC, and all they gotta do is keep going around to the corner stores, pestering the Koreans to sell them cigarettes!

As I'm driving out the parking lot I notice in my rear-view mirror both those kids running out the door in the direction of the new Temple of Public Health a couple of blocks away. Geez, I don't think they even locked that door behind them...

Frankly, I think the KFC gets a bit of a bad rap. Sure, you only make minimum wage, and sure, their supply chain is a little rough on the chickens, but I have it on good authority from multiple former employees that you get to take the leftover fried chicken home at the end of the day!

For free!

Anyway, the Farm Manager is never gonna allow me to apply for that gig, so no point fantasizing about it.

So I'm driving down the road while eating my health-destroying fried chicken, wondering what the local health tyrant would think of that. After all, eating while driving isn't the innocent pastime it used to be. I know Dr. Hazel Lynn would not approve. Not only am I risking obesity and all its attendant evils, I'm endangering every other vehicle on the road!

If folks are being fined for eating burgers while driving, eating fried chicken is that much worse, at least if you're determined to keep chicken grease off your clothes. Try it! You'll agree this offence merits a few demerit points at the least.

Maybe even a license suspension.

As for those kids and their employment opportunity, I wish them well. I know the Public Health Unit is one gold-plated gig. Hell, they got fifteen people on the official "sunshine list!" Even the Director of Tobacco Enforcement and Variety Store Entrapment pulls down well over $100,000 a year!

But I should ease up on those folks. I'm sure they mean just as well as they earn. After all, Canada didn't become a world leader in warnings on cigarette packaging without the efforts of many well paid people who really care. In fact, there is statistical proof that their perpetual anti-smoking campaign is paying big dividends; Canadian cigarette consumption is now ranked at 63rd in the world!

Thank you Hazel Lynn!

There's just one thing I'd like her to explain. According to the latest OECD life expectancy stats (2013), Japan, Spain, and Switzerland rank first, second, and third in life expectancy, while Canada languishes in 13th place.

In each of those three countries, per capita cigarette consumption is well over double that in Canada.

Oregon and "white privilege"

There's a lot of internet chatter about how those so-called patriots converging on Oregon today are the beneficiaries of something called "white privilege." That's where white folks allegedly get away with shit that black folks would get shot down in the street for, no questions asked.

I would direct those who subscribe to this theory to Waco massacre one (1993) and Waco massacre two (2015).

In both cases, having a white ass did nothing to save those seen as a possible threat, no matter how insignificant, to the Empire.

Religious nutters.

Bikers.

Patriots...

Black teens...

It's all the same to Uncle Sam.

Four days on, Dubai skyscraper gutted by fire still standing

Silly me!

I went on the record a couple of times predicting the imminent collapse of that 63 floors of steel and glass.

After all, that's what happens when steel and glass buildings go up in flames, isn't it?

So, my face is red... sorry folks!

Obviously it takes a lot more than a fire to bring down one of those!

We'll see $150 oil overnight if the Iran-Saudi spat becomes a shooting war

Both countries have the capacity to cripple each other's oil infrastructure. Ponder that for awhile when you contemplate the potential ramifications of the scary headlines you're seeing today.

Outrage over Saudi's execution of a prominent Shia cleric has got the entire neighbourhood on a keener edge than ever before. This is a story that has numerous backstories. There's an ongoing power-struggle going on in Saudi Arabia that is both internecine and inter-generational, and all bets are off on who might prevail.

Then you've got your outside interests, primarily the US, Israel, and Russia. The American's have been making nice with Iran, at least at the official level. However, there is a huge cadre of neocons in the beltway who have seen these efforts to normalize US-Iran relations as a stab in the back to our Israeli allies. And of course that's how it's perceived among some elements of the Saudi elite as well.

Meanwhile, there's also been a steady back and forth between Moscow and Riyadh in diplomatic traffic. At least some elements in the Saudi ruling clique recognize that the current "make up for price by selling more volume" strategy is, in the long run, economic suicide for Saudi Arabia. If it goes on long enough, it will cripple the Russian economy as well.

That's a lot of very unpredictable balls in the air.

The prudent investor might want to consider bulking up on crude futures. WTI has gained a couple of percentage points today, but that's nothing compared to what will happen when the Strait of Hormuz is shut down.

And that is a very real and very imminent possibility.

How is this a "news" story?

The brain trust at CBC News dug deep to come up with this gem.

Yup, Peter Munk done gifted a big dose of inappropriate cash to the Harper gang. It's a promising headline, but when you get into the nitty-gritty of the story, you cannot help but conclude that it's mostly bullshit.

There's plenty of ugly shit in Peter Munk's wake that anyone wanting to write scintillating take-downs could readily dig into. We've done it often enough right here at Falling Downs. But this CBC expose is about what? Exceeding campaign contribution limits by a few hundred dollars?

That's a few hundred dollars, not a few hundred thousand or a few hundred million. CBC's crack team of investigative reporters made at least ten times more in wages whilst researching this story than what that supposed malfeasance amounted to.

This is a story?

Get outta here!

Will 2016 be the year Hitler finally gets some respect?

Maybe. Things look promising on this first day of the new year. Our erstwhile NATO ally the wily Erdogan has gone on the record as being an Adolf admirer.

And the late and much lamented Lemmy seems to have been a fan as well, although in his case the attraction seems to have been more sartorial than ideological. It's hard to argue with that; I mean those SS dudes did sport some snazzy uniforms.

Hitler's legacy has for too long been besmirched by that unfortunate Holocaust business, which seems manifestly unfair. It's a bit like remembering Michael Vick only for his hobby instead of his prowess as an athlete. But no less an authority than Israel's PM Mr. Netanyahu has done yeoman's work in erasing that particular stigma by revealing the fact that the Holocaust wasn't even Hitler's idea.

So maybe 2016 will be more than the Year of the Monkey; it may also be the year of Hitler's rehabilitation.