If you take a glance at the headlines more than once a week, you already know this headline is bullshit.
Here's the real headline.
North Korea doesn't have much choice about America having nuclear weapons. After all, America is the only country in the world that has ever used them. On a civilian population.
Those devious North Koreans took a lesson away from that.
If there's even the slightest chance that the Yanks will think there's a hot one coming back, they'll think twice about sending one your way...
It's worked so far.
This is a conundrum that has bedevilled America forever. How do we get the lesser peoples to forgo nukes when we've got them hanging over their heads all day every day?
Good question.
Tuesday, July 4, 2017
What to do when the cops impound your Ferrari
Great story here about some toff having his Ferrari 458 impounded for doing 200 kph on the Lion's Gate Bridge.
No indication in the story, but I'll hazard a guess that said toff was a Chinese kid studying at SFU who lives alone in a 4,000 foot waterview abode.
Vancouver is stuffed full of irascible youngsters just like that.
What's that poor kid gonna do for a week while his Ferrari is in impound?
Why, drive his Lambo of course!
No indication in the story, but I'll hazard a guess that said toff was a Chinese kid studying at SFU who lives alone in a 4,000 foot waterview abode.
Vancouver is stuffed full of irascible youngsters just like that.
What's that poor kid gonna do for a week while his Ferrari is in impound?
Why, drive his Lambo of course!
Another reason you should have doubts about this thing we call "progress"
When I was fourteen years old I got a summer job with the farmer across the road. It was a fun job. I got to drive stuff. Tractors. Trucks. Random farm machinery. It was heaven for a fourteen year old!
The farmer was a guy named Alex Anderson, and the farm had one of those "Century Farm" plaques at the end of the laneway. Those were given out as part of Canada's centennial celebration to honour farms that had been in the same family at least since confederation in 1867.
I got paid a dollar an hour for my 60 hour week. Deducted from that generous wage was the value of the dinner I had at noon every day with Alex and his two spinster sisters, which left me with about forty bucks in my pocket at the end of the week. Not that I complained. That dinner was the real deal. Meat and potatoes and gravy every single day, and a slice of pie (100% home made) too!
After dinner Alex would tell stories about the good old days, and then he'd fade away for his daily after-dinner nap, leaving me to attend to some of the simpler chores to which I could be entrusted without supervision.
I got up to all sorts of hilarity on those unsupervised work hours. I made it a personal quest to see if I could get the speedometer in his old Chevy pick-up truck to touch the 100 mph mark as I was making my way back to the corn field.
Never made it, but the time I got real close (over 90 mph) kinda put a scare into me. Stayed on the gas a little too long and hit the brakes a little too late, and by God, for a split second I thought I'd be fired for sure and Alex would have to buy a new truck.
By the way, that "split second" still feels like it took fifteen minutes to play out.
But I saved it.
So one of the yarns Alex shared with me was about the guy who'd put up the concrete silo at his farm. He was an elderly Scotsman who had for decades earned his living as a master builder. He specialized in building bridges and water towers. He was in high demand. There remain bridges on county roads today that he built 100 years ago that you can still drive over.
None of his stuff ever fell down.
Alas, somewhere along the arc of progress, it was decreed that only a certified engineer could be entrusted with the task of putting up a bridge or a water tower. Buddy was not a certified engineer.
He was reduced to putting up farm silos for what was left of his working life.
When I lived in New Brunswick in the early '90s there was a story much in the news about the collapse of the new Fredericton water tower. That was a job that made oodles of work for oodles of certified engineers and project engineers and consulting engineers, so a lot of well-educated faces went red when the thing fell down the first time they tried to fill it with water.
That's not a good thing when you just had all those certified engineers put it up.
I'm reminded of this because of a story I read today. Seems that some engineering types have been busy analysing the concrete that the ancient Romans used on their infrastructure projects. The Romans had better concrete two thousand years ago than what our engineering brainiacs are using today.
Figures.
That's progress for you!
The farmer was a guy named Alex Anderson, and the farm had one of those "Century Farm" plaques at the end of the laneway. Those were given out as part of Canada's centennial celebration to honour farms that had been in the same family at least since confederation in 1867.
I got paid a dollar an hour for my 60 hour week. Deducted from that generous wage was the value of the dinner I had at noon every day with Alex and his two spinster sisters, which left me with about forty bucks in my pocket at the end of the week. Not that I complained. That dinner was the real deal. Meat and potatoes and gravy every single day, and a slice of pie (100% home made) too!
After dinner Alex would tell stories about the good old days, and then he'd fade away for his daily after-dinner nap, leaving me to attend to some of the simpler chores to which I could be entrusted without supervision.
I got up to all sorts of hilarity on those unsupervised work hours. I made it a personal quest to see if I could get the speedometer in his old Chevy pick-up truck to touch the 100 mph mark as I was making my way back to the corn field.
Never made it, but the time I got real close (over 90 mph) kinda put a scare into me. Stayed on the gas a little too long and hit the brakes a little too late, and by God, for a split second I thought I'd be fired for sure and Alex would have to buy a new truck.
By the way, that "split second" still feels like it took fifteen minutes to play out.
But I saved it.
So one of the yarns Alex shared with me was about the guy who'd put up the concrete silo at his farm. He was an elderly Scotsman who had for decades earned his living as a master builder. He specialized in building bridges and water towers. He was in high demand. There remain bridges on county roads today that he built 100 years ago that you can still drive over.
None of his stuff ever fell down.
Alas, somewhere along the arc of progress, it was decreed that only a certified engineer could be entrusted with the task of putting up a bridge or a water tower. Buddy was not a certified engineer.
He was reduced to putting up farm silos for what was left of his working life.
When I lived in New Brunswick in the early '90s there was a story much in the news about the collapse of the new Fredericton water tower. That was a job that made oodles of work for oodles of certified engineers and project engineers and consulting engineers, so a lot of well-educated faces went red when the thing fell down the first time they tried to fill it with water.
That's not a good thing when you just had all those certified engineers put it up.
I'm reminded of this because of a story I read today. Seems that some engineering types have been busy analysing the concrete that the ancient Romans used on their infrastructure projects. The Romans had better concrete two thousand years ago than what our engineering brainiacs are using today.
Figures.
That's progress for you!
Islamic terror (finally) visits Canada
And not just any place in Canada, but at the beating heart of our very national identity; a Canadian Tire store!
Don't say the think tank here at Falling Downs hasn't warned you. We've been saying for years that sooner or later there's gonna be payback for all the stability we've been helping the NATO gang bring to Afghanistan, Libya, Iraq...
It was just a matter of time.
Now it's time for all right-thinking Canadians to shop in solidarity in this dark hour.
Go buy something at your local Canadian Tire store.
Don't say the think tank here at Falling Downs hasn't warned you. We've been saying for years that sooner or later there's gonna be payback for all the stability we've been helping the NATO gang bring to Afghanistan, Libya, Iraq...
It was just a matter of time.
Now it's time for all right-thinking Canadians to shop in solidarity in this dark hour.
Go buy something at your local Canadian Tire store.
After 241 years, Uncle Sam still has head up arse
Figured I'd go to the patriotic network and see if I can glean what's on the minds of patriotic Americans this Independence Day. I wasn't disappointed. Fox News producer Steve Kurtz has a few timely thoughts. Along with the predictable clap-trap about the constitution and freedom of speech, and how American militarism has made the world a safer place etc., I found this gem:
7-11
Life is hard enough, so it's nice to know there's a place to go at 3 am, even if it's just for cigarettes and lottery tickets.
How true! Yup, nowhere else in history has anyone had the freedom to buy cigarettes and lottery tickets at 3 am! Shows yet again how much we take for granted, doesn't it!
Steve, you are truly a living testimonial to America's education system.
Elsewhere at Fox, Dr. Heather Wilson and General David Goldfein give themselves a shout-out for the great work the USAF has been doing in the Middle East.
Linger over that last paragraph. The US has been "in continuous combat for 26 years..."
Doing what?
"Providing stability..."
Hey, maybe after another 26 years of continuous combat the folks in Baghdad and Damascus will enjoy the freedom to step out for cigarettes and lottery tickets at 3 am!
God bless America!
7-11
Life is hard enough, so it's nice to know there's a place to go at 3 am, even if it's just for cigarettes and lottery tickets.
How true! Yup, nowhere else in history has anyone had the freedom to buy cigarettes and lottery tickets at 3 am! Shows yet again how much we take for granted, doesn't it!
Steve, you are truly a living testimonial to America's education system.
Elsewhere at Fox, Dr. Heather Wilson and General David Goldfein give themselves a shout-out for the great work the USAF has been doing in the Middle East.
Linger over that last paragraph. The US has been "in continuous combat for 26 years..."
Doing what?
"Providing stability..."
Hey, maybe after another 26 years of continuous combat the folks in Baghdad and Damascus will enjoy the freedom to step out for cigarettes and lottery tickets at 3 am!
God bless America!
Monday, July 3, 2017
The Kaka files; what to do when your laxative is choking you
Here's an ominous headline: Bayer recalls RestoraLAX due to potential choking hazard.
WTF? I thought laxatives were about the tailpipe, not the windpipe!
So maybe this Bayer innovation opens up the one by closing off the other?
That's some crazy shit!
WTF? I thought laxatives were about the tailpipe, not the windpipe!
So maybe this Bayer innovation opens up the one by closing off the other?
That's some crazy shit!
Sunday, July 2, 2017
How to bring Americans together
Legalize weed!
Check out this diverse gaggle lined up to buy legal weed in Nevada:
I see a couple of Trump voters, a few Hillary voters, and that nerdy looking dude in the middle can only be a Bernie bro. They're all sharing the same space and there's no eye-gouging, no hair-pulling, and no angry hands at each other's throats.
Wanna truly make America great again? Legalize weed in all fifty states!
Check out this diverse gaggle lined up to buy legal weed in Nevada:
I see a couple of Trump voters, a few Hillary voters, and that nerdy looking dude in the middle can only be a Bernie bro. They're all sharing the same space and there's no eye-gouging, no hair-pulling, and no angry hands at each other's throats.
Wanna truly make America great again? Legalize weed in all fifty states!
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