Best of times for Amazon and Walmart; worst of times for independent retail

As Toronto re-enters lockdown on account of the "second wave," there's umbrage in the air over the fact that Walmart and some other big chains will remain open, while independent retailers are forced to close.

Independent retail has been up against it for a long time, long before the pandemic. In a nutshell, the reason is this; people would rather save a few cents shopping at Amazon or Walmart, than to pay a little more and keep their local independents in business. 

The pandemic is the final nail in the coffin for a wide swath of independent businesses. We'll be happy enough to blame the virus for their demise, when the truth is that everyone who's ever shopped Walmart, Costco, or Amazon deserves a share of the blame. 

When we are conditioned to measure our lives by how much crap we consume, a retail model that optimizes crap-per-dollar will inevitably prevail.

Shame on all of us.

Todt Hill and all that Mafia jazz

Check out CNN or Fox or MSNBC and you'll see a good old story about a Mafia Don (not the one in the White House) who got... ventilated?... on Staten Island yesterday.

That's some crazy shit!... a scene right outta the Godfather, or so Fox and CNN and MSNBC would have us think.

Apparently the prestigious Todt Hill hood, with the best views on the Eastern Seaboard south of Maine,  is just a-flush with big-time mafioso...

So, being a naive Canadian lefty whack-job, I thought I'd take a look at real estate in the Todt Hill neighbourhood.

Here's what a million and a half (US$) gets you on Staten Island, home of Mafia Central Command.

That's a pretty sweet spot, is it not? Five bedrooms, five bathrooms, a quarter acre lot twenty minutes drive from midtown Manhattan?

Here's what a million and a half (US$) gets you in Toronto. A raised bungalow on a fifty foot lot, twenty minutes drive from Bay and Front.


Looks to me like the City of Toronto should be trying to recruit Mafia bosses instead of Amazon, if affordable housing is the goal.

Putin unleashes major winter storm on America in mid-April

What? You thought it was pure innocent Mother Nature behind this meteorological mayhem?

No way!

Remember the news reports about those Ruskie Tu-22 long range bombers "testing" America's air defence perimeter a couple weeks ago?

They weren't testing anything. They were cloud seeding.

Yup, that's a thing. Google it.

Putin was hoping that the ensuing mayhem would befall Gotham City and Gomorrah. In fact, he was counting on it. This mid-April surprise was intended to loosen us up for his next surprise; a full-on assault on Gotham and Gom... oops, I mean NYC and Washington.

Alas, all that cloud seeding was for naught. The hand of God reached out, as it always does for the Exceptional Nation, and tweaked the jet stream just enough to direct that storm to Toronto, away from NYC and Washington.

Praise the Lord!


But those poor dumbshits in Toronto still can't figure out what they did to deserve this...

Why big fat slobs make great politicians

I'm not saying you have to like their politics, but big fat slobs make great politicians.

Why?

I think it's the "everyman" image that carrying around an extra 150 pounds conveys.

Look at Chris Christie for example. Christie wouldn't know a good idea if it kicked him in the teeth, but he's immensely popular with the masses. In fact, if he was running for president today Obama would be in trouble.

Instead, the Republicans picked that skinny-ass Mormon and look how things are going.

The smart money is already banking on Christie for 2016.

Or look at Rob Ford. He ran for mayor of Toronto on the most reactionary platform one could imagine.

Stop the gravy train!

The goddamn garbage collectors are going to be GETTING GODDAMN PENSIONS for fucks sakes!

WAKE UP TORONTO!!!

Now Toronto is probably one of the most lame-ass liberal cities in the world. You can't smoke a cigarette within 100 metres of a playground because the tykes might start smoking on account of your bad example.

They recently had a debate about whether they should ban the sale of bullets.

You need a dog permit to walk your dog. And if your dog takes a crap on city property, the dogshit police are hiding behind the cedar hedge recording the particulars for the ensuing court action.

But big fat Rob Ford won this crowd over because he's a BIG FAT SLOB!!!

Nevermind the obesity epidemic. Big fat politicians are the wave of the future.