Frankly, Rip This Joint gets my vote as best Stones tune ever.
Watch any of the recent live versions on Youtube and see how the aging geezers can hardly keep up...
I suppose one reason I like it so much is that I raised hell at a union hall myself once.
In my voluminous archives I have a letter informing "Brother Neumann" of his lifetime ban from the premises of the Steelworkers Hall in Guelph.
It was all Igor's fault.
I can't remember precisely what it was that Igor did to antagonize me, but he'd been antagonizing me for hours, and the more beers I had at the union hall the more antagonized I got.
Finally he pushed me over the edge. I couldn't take the antagonization anymore...
I had no choice... he forced me to pour a pitcher of beer over his head.
Well, that should have been the end of it, but no!
Igor whacked me across the face with a beer glass!
I know! Who can even imagine such a thing!
A brawl ensued.
Igor got a good thrashing.
I know that isn't his story, but trust me, it's the truth.
Unfortunately, the cut that beer glass opened up over my right eye wouldn't stop bleeding.
It was eventually decided that Brother Neumann needed to go to the emergency ward for stitches.
The crew arrives at the Guelph General Hospital, and who do we run into but Igor!
He'd beat me there to get his own stitches!
Hey, how ya doin' man... sorry about your head.
Ya, I'm OK, sorry about your eye...
Long story short, me and Igor walk outta the emergency ward arm in arm, head back to the union hall, drink till closing time, bloody bandages wrapped around our heads, and we've never had a note of animosity between us ever since!
Then two weeks later I get that snotty letter from the USW.
Saturday, July 6, 2013
How to pass a drug test
I guess I should have clarified things right there in the title...
I can't help you if you're on crack or meth or any of that bathtub chemistry-project shit that is going around.
You're on your own. And you're an idiot.
If, on the other hand, your tool of choice is God's own herb, the weed of wisdom, you might want to listen up.
So Buddy who I've known for 40 years has been driving the big rigs from Alaska to Brownsville, from Long Beach to Saint John for about 5 million miles by now, and I know for a fact that at least 4 and a half of those the dude was under the influence of the weed of wisdom.
No, it's not Willy Nelson.
So the reason Buddy never gets nabbed on a dope test is that he keeps a supply of clean pee in his freezer. He gets the call to come in for a random pee test, he's got it figured out to the minute how to get that urine sample that's been in the freezer for six months to body temp in the time it takes to drive to the lab.
That's been working for 40 years.
And there hasn't been an accident in 5 million miles.
I can't help you if you're on crack or meth or any of that bathtub chemistry-project shit that is going around.
You're on your own. And you're an idiot.
If, on the other hand, your tool of choice is God's own herb, the weed of wisdom, you might want to listen up.
So Buddy who I've known for 40 years has been driving the big rigs from Alaska to Brownsville, from Long Beach to Saint John for about 5 million miles by now, and I know for a fact that at least 4 and a half of those the dude was under the influence of the weed of wisdom.
No, it's not Willy Nelson.
So the reason Buddy never gets nabbed on a dope test is that he keeps a supply of clean pee in his freezer. He gets the call to come in for a random pee test, he's got it figured out to the minute how to get that urine sample that's been in the freezer for six months to body temp in the time it takes to drive to the lab.
That's been working for 40 years.
And there hasn't been an accident in 5 million miles.
Friday, July 5, 2013
The sins of Mohamed Morsi
It's been two days since Egypt's US trained and financed military overthrew the democratically elected President Morsi.
Is there any serious person who believes such a thing would happen without a green light from the US?
There is no doubt that there was mass dissatisfaction with Morsi among the Egyptian public. That dissatisfaction had little to do with Morsi's supposedly Islamist agenda.
From the beginning Morsi went out of his way to appease the US and Israel. The Egypt-Israel peace accord was respected in full. In spite of much pro-Palestinian rhetoric, the Gaza tunnels were far more restricted under Morsi than they were in the Mubarak era.
Domestically, Morsi allowed the price of food to rise to garner favor with European trading partners. The pending end of fuel subsidies was his attempt to appease the IMF.
As recently as three weeks ago Morsi was parroting the most jingoistic anti-Assad rhetoric in yet another attempt to gain favor in Washington.
With a year of slavish toadying to Washington under his belt, Morsi had every reason to believe that the greatest democracy in the world and it's erstwhile sidekick, the only democracy in the Middle East, would allow him to see out his democratically elected term.
That was obviously a miscalculation.
So now what?
The military bosses are promising new elections. Will the next elected leader succumb to the next Twitter mob as well?
Is this all part of a grand strategy to create in every Arab state conditions of perpetual upheaval and anarchy?
Perhaps Libya is the model of a perfect Arab state in the eyes of Washington. Civil society in chaos, the country bankrupt, but the oil sector humming along smoothly and the profits going... well, who knows, but certainly not to Libya.
If that is the case, then Morsi's greatest sin was not his supposed Islamist fundamentalism, but his eagerness to appease the West.
Is there any serious person who believes such a thing would happen without a green light from the US?
There is no doubt that there was mass dissatisfaction with Morsi among the Egyptian public. That dissatisfaction had little to do with Morsi's supposedly Islamist agenda.
From the beginning Morsi went out of his way to appease the US and Israel. The Egypt-Israel peace accord was respected in full. In spite of much pro-Palestinian rhetoric, the Gaza tunnels were far more restricted under Morsi than they were in the Mubarak era.
Domestically, Morsi allowed the price of food to rise to garner favor with European trading partners. The pending end of fuel subsidies was his attempt to appease the IMF.
As recently as three weeks ago Morsi was parroting the most jingoistic anti-Assad rhetoric in yet another attempt to gain favor in Washington.
With a year of slavish toadying to Washington under his belt, Morsi had every reason to believe that the greatest democracy in the world and it's erstwhile sidekick, the only democracy in the Middle East, would allow him to see out his democratically elected term.
That was obviously a miscalculation.
So now what?
The military bosses are promising new elections. Will the next elected leader succumb to the next Twitter mob as well?
Is this all part of a grand strategy to create in every Arab state conditions of perpetual upheaval and anarchy?
Perhaps Libya is the model of a perfect Arab state in the eyes of Washington. Civil society in chaos, the country bankrupt, but the oil sector humming along smoothly and the profits going... well, who knows, but certainly not to Libya.
If that is the case, then Morsi's greatest sin was not his supposed Islamist fundamentalism, but his eagerness to appease the West.
Thursday, July 4, 2013
nicotine run
Back in the day there was folks who made a decent living buying up smokes in the low tax or no tax states and running them up to New York or Detroit.
More recently a few of the Native brothers up here did OK for themselves running duty-free Canadian cigarettes back into Canada.
I don't think Junior had any of that in mind when he came up with this.
The kid got some talent.
More recently a few of the Native brothers up here did OK for themselves running duty-free Canadian cigarettes back into Canada.
I don't think Junior had any of that in mind when he came up with this.
The kid got some talent.
Poster girl for women's equality shot dead in Afghanistan
Lieutenant Islam Bibi was no stranger to Western media.
That might be one of the factors that made her a target of insurgents yesterday. Most media coverage is focused on this being a symbolic strike against women's rights, but that's probably an oversimplification.
Afghan National Police are gunned down at the rate of three to ten per day. If Afghan women want to be cops, they're going to take their chances. Sooner or later they could be shot down too.
There is no reliable evidence to show that the Taliban hates women Afghan cops any more than they hate cops in general. The Afghan National Police are seen as stooges of the occupiers, which would be a reasonable conclusion from the perspective of the Taliban.
Not only that, they are widely despised by the general population for their rampant corruption.
So while Islam Bibi was a minor celebrity in certain circles in the West, she met the same fate that eventually catches up with many of her male compatriots in Afghanistan.
Let's not make her a martyr for women's rights.
That might be one of the factors that made her a target of insurgents yesterday. Most media coverage is focused on this being a symbolic strike against women's rights, but that's probably an oversimplification.
Afghan National Police are gunned down at the rate of three to ten per day. If Afghan women want to be cops, they're going to take their chances. Sooner or later they could be shot down too.
There is no reliable evidence to show that the Taliban hates women Afghan cops any more than they hate cops in general. The Afghan National Police are seen as stooges of the occupiers, which would be a reasonable conclusion from the perspective of the Taliban.
Not only that, they are widely despised by the general population for their rampant corruption.
So while Islam Bibi was a minor celebrity in certain circles in the West, she met the same fate that eventually catches up with many of her male compatriots in Afghanistan.
Let's not make her a martyr for women's rights.
The Canada Day bomb plot: "profoundly shocking" or obvious bullshit?
BC preem Christy Clark claims she finds the Canada Day bomb plot "profoundly shocking."
Everybody who knew the two alleged bombers are certainly profoundly shocked. They were a couple of white trash druggies on welfare who don't have the wherewithal to come up with the monthly rent, let alone a bomb plot.
The RCMP claims they intervened early and the public was never at risk.
I believe them.
I believe the RCMP intervened early. Early enough to coax those two along on their path to becoming "terrorists." Early enough to supply the pressure cookers and the bomb-making materials. In fact, when this comes to trial we'll once again see that without the use of well-paid RCMP informants this case would never have happened.
Public Safety Minister Vic Toews claims this is more proof that we must be ever vigilant.
When you spend billions fighting non-existent terrorists, it's essential that you find some once in awhile, just to keep the public on board.
But I must say the caliber of the "terrorists" they are finding is downright disappointing. Two drug addicted white misfits who love heavy metal music and recently converted to Islam?...
And suddenly they want to become heavy metal jihadists?
Ya, right...
Everybody who knew the two alleged bombers are certainly profoundly shocked. They were a couple of white trash druggies on welfare who don't have the wherewithal to come up with the monthly rent, let alone a bomb plot.
The RCMP claims they intervened early and the public was never at risk.
I believe them.
I believe the RCMP intervened early. Early enough to coax those two along on their path to becoming "terrorists." Early enough to supply the pressure cookers and the bomb-making materials. In fact, when this comes to trial we'll once again see that without the use of well-paid RCMP informants this case would never have happened.
Public Safety Minister Vic Toews claims this is more proof that we must be ever vigilant.
When you spend billions fighting non-existent terrorists, it's essential that you find some once in awhile, just to keep the public on board.
But I must say the caliber of the "terrorists" they are finding is downright disappointing. Two drug addicted white misfits who love heavy metal music and recently converted to Islam?...
And suddenly they want to become heavy metal jihadists?
Ya, right...
Fridges and loathing at Falling Downs
The instructions for switching the handles on the new refrigerator from right to left side started on page 11 of the owners manual. They ended on page 18.
The Farm Manager has been lobbying for months for a new fridge. Not that there's anything wrong with the old fridge. Except that a couple of the plastic shelves in the door have cracked.
The reason those shelves have cracked is because, and I'm not going to name names, somebody crams way too much crap in there.
Personally, I'm a refrigerator minimalist. If there's more in your fridge than a twelve-pack and a jar of pickled eggs you're on the slippery slope to pathological hoarding. It's definitely not me who crams way too much crap in there.
Anyway, yesterday was the big day. We took the truck into town and loaded up a new Kenmore fridge at Sears. Got a damn good deal too - hundred bucks off because it was a "floor model."
They used to make the Kenmore brand in Cambridge, back when we still built appliances in this country. This one comes from Mexico, one of the manifold blessings that NAFTA brought us.
I hadn't really planned ahead, and all I had to secure the fridge was a thirty foot tow strap. That took a little ingenuity to wrap around the fridge and I wasn't feeling too good about the result. One wrong move and that new Kenmore was going overboard...
That actually happened to me once. Luckily it was an old Kenmore on its way to the old-fridge graveyard. Did that bend under the railway tracks with just a bit too much speed, and WHOOPSIE!!! As fate would have it, there was no one immediately behind me, so after a moment's hesitation I just kept driving.
That actually saved me the bullshit twenty dollar fee they charge you when you drop off an old fridge.
So I was driving real careful. It's one thing to lose an old fridge, but especially with the Farm Manager riding shotgun, there'd be hell to pay if I lost the new one.
Get out here to the ranch and gather up the tools I need for the handle switch-over. That is the one and only instruction in that owner's manual that made any sense. That's because they show you a picture of an adjustable wrench and a Phillips screwdriver and a 3/8 socket.
After that it rapidly became a nightmare. "If you have a model 1410, proceed to page 14. For model 1409, follow instructions beginning on page 12, and then skip to page 15 after step 3. For models 2410 - 2420 follow steps 1-7 on pages 11-13 and then follow steps 8-10 on page 15. Thank you for choosing a Kenmore."
I am not by nature a follow-the-instructions kind of guy, but I've been trying to get better these past few years. I read those instructions. Then I read them again.
As far as I'm concerned none of the pictures of handles looked like the handles on the fridge in front of me.
Meanwhile the Farm Manager was pulling the contents out of the old fridge. It's amazing how much stuff can get lost in a modestly sized refrigerator. I had no idea we had four different brands of hot sauce in the house. Five flavors of mustard. Three jars of olives, a jar of pickled hot pepper rings that looked a very unpalatable shade of grey...
After spending 45 minutes reading the instruction manual I finally tossed it in the corner in frustration. I'll just do this the old-school way - by intuition.
Had those handles swapped over in under a half hour.
Appliance manufacture used to be a big business in Canada. All the major brand names were built here at one time or another. I think Woods in Guelph was the last Canadian manufacturer, and they built their last freezer in Canada in 2009. Even before the Woods family sold out a couple of years before that, they had opened a manufacturing plant in Mexico.
That's all part of the NAFTA legacy. Thousands of manufacturing jobs gone to Mexico, and we're still waiting for all those new high-tech jobs that were supposed to take their place.
But I digress. We got the new fridge set up in the kitchen, and the old one is in the wood shed with a twelve-pack and a jar of pickled eggs.
The Farm Manager has been lobbying for months for a new fridge. Not that there's anything wrong with the old fridge. Except that a couple of the plastic shelves in the door have cracked.
The reason those shelves have cracked is because, and I'm not going to name names, somebody crams way too much crap in there.
Personally, I'm a refrigerator minimalist. If there's more in your fridge than a twelve-pack and a jar of pickled eggs you're on the slippery slope to pathological hoarding. It's definitely not me who crams way too much crap in there.
Anyway, yesterday was the big day. We took the truck into town and loaded up a new Kenmore fridge at Sears. Got a damn good deal too - hundred bucks off because it was a "floor model."
They used to make the Kenmore brand in Cambridge, back when we still built appliances in this country. This one comes from Mexico, one of the manifold blessings that NAFTA brought us.
I hadn't really planned ahead, and all I had to secure the fridge was a thirty foot tow strap. That took a little ingenuity to wrap around the fridge and I wasn't feeling too good about the result. One wrong move and that new Kenmore was going overboard...
That actually happened to me once. Luckily it was an old Kenmore on its way to the old-fridge graveyard. Did that bend under the railway tracks with just a bit too much speed, and WHOOPSIE!!! As fate would have it, there was no one immediately behind me, so after a moment's hesitation I just kept driving.
That actually saved me the bullshit twenty dollar fee they charge you when you drop off an old fridge.
So I was driving real careful. It's one thing to lose an old fridge, but especially with the Farm Manager riding shotgun, there'd be hell to pay if I lost the new one.
Get out here to the ranch and gather up the tools I need for the handle switch-over. That is the one and only instruction in that owner's manual that made any sense. That's because they show you a picture of an adjustable wrench and a Phillips screwdriver and a 3/8 socket.
After that it rapidly became a nightmare. "If you have a model 1410, proceed to page 14. For model 1409, follow instructions beginning on page 12, and then skip to page 15 after step 3. For models 2410 - 2420 follow steps 1-7 on pages 11-13 and then follow steps 8-10 on page 15. Thank you for choosing a Kenmore."
I am not by nature a follow-the-instructions kind of guy, but I've been trying to get better these past few years. I read those instructions. Then I read them again.
As far as I'm concerned none of the pictures of handles looked like the handles on the fridge in front of me.
Meanwhile the Farm Manager was pulling the contents out of the old fridge. It's amazing how much stuff can get lost in a modestly sized refrigerator. I had no idea we had four different brands of hot sauce in the house. Five flavors of mustard. Three jars of olives, a jar of pickled hot pepper rings that looked a very unpalatable shade of grey...
After spending 45 minutes reading the instruction manual I finally tossed it in the corner in frustration. I'll just do this the old-school way - by intuition.
Had those handles swapped over in under a half hour.
Appliance manufacture used to be a big business in Canada. All the major brand names were built here at one time or another. I think Woods in Guelph was the last Canadian manufacturer, and they built their last freezer in Canada in 2009. Even before the Woods family sold out a couple of years before that, they had opened a manufacturing plant in Mexico.
That's all part of the NAFTA legacy. Thousands of manufacturing jobs gone to Mexico, and we're still waiting for all those new high-tech jobs that were supposed to take their place.
But I digress. We got the new fridge set up in the kitchen, and the old one is in the wood shed with a twelve-pack and a jar of pickled eggs.
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