Saturday, April 21, 2018

Ramping up the dumbing-down in Retardation Nation

I've long suspected that the editing function at Canada's newspaper of record has become the province of their unpaid interns. Now I'm wondering what high schools they're recruiting those interns from.

Take this caption from a photo on the back page of the sports section; "Seene last year in her home in White Rock, B.C., Olympic weightlifter Christine Girard wear her bronze medal..."

Really? Two flubs in one sentence?

Or, how about informing the reader, in a story about the DNC lawsuit against Russia, Wikileaks, and the 2016 Trump campaign, that Trump is a Republican? I would think that anybody picking up a Globe and Mail already knew that.

That story in itself promises to be an entertaining footnote in the Big Book 'o Bullshit & Bamboozlement documenting the last fifty years of America's descent into self-parody. Nuclear-armed self-parody with a Manhattan condo hustler in the White House making America great again. What could be funnier than that?

After a year and a half of various investigations into the matter have turned up nothing but speculation and innuendo, the same DNC brain trust that originally promoted Trump's candidacy and stabbed Bernie in the back figures they'll get to the bottom of things with a lawsuit?


Elsewhere, guest self-promoter Rick Lash has some tips on unleashing your inner genius. Although it's probably a little late for me, I'm a sucker for this self-helpy shit. It's nice to think that with a little tweaking I coulda been another da Vinci or Elon Musk.

While Lash doesn't mention it, Musk's true genius has been in convincing investors that Tesla has the same market value as Ford.

Ford builds more cars every month than Tesla has built in its history. Ford turns a profit and pays dividends.

Tesla burns through borrowed money like a East Hastings drunk goes through Listerine. Clearly, the only thing propping up Tesla's share price is a mass contagion of wishful thinking, but for now at least, the companies have equal value.

That's genius alright!

Retardation Nation indeed.

1 comment:

  1. Hey,hey,hey...take it easy on us drunks out west, eh!