Thursday, March 24, 2016

Pope Francis admits to kissing feet of Muslim migrants

Apparently he wisely washed their feet first!

And who wouldn't? I mean, if you're into kissing the feet of some dude who walked to Rome from Kabul, you'd be well advised to give those feet a good scrub first, wouldn't you?

The think tank here at falling downs couldn't be more aboard with the Pope's humanitarianism; we truly are all brothers, are we not? The Catholic, the Hindu, the Muslim, the Jew... we are all children of the same God.

But it might take some time for the general public to get on the feel-good bandwagon, especially after that latest business in Brussels, and in the interval I sense a business opportunity.

Trump may think he's gonna build a fence down the middle of the Rio Grande, but it's an engineering challenge of a completely different order of magnitude to build one down the middle of the Adriatic Sea. As in, it ain't gonna happen in our lifetimes. Even the Israelis, wall-builders extraordinaire, couldn't pull that off.

That means the Adriatic will be wide open for the foreseeable future. Wide open for what, you ask? Wide open for stuffing the cuddy of your Donzi 45 with a couple dozen desperate migrants and heading for Otranto or Brindisi with those triple supercharged big-blocks at redline!

A couple of dozen would fit comfortably in the front of a Donzi 45, especially if you took out the pimp-den and the galley. You'd be marketing to the premium refugee, of course. The riff-raff are paying scoundrels two thousand euros to lead them to a razor wire fence on the Bulgarian border. The premium class will be happy to pay ten thousand a head to be led ashore in Italy.

Did you realize that it's hardly fifty miles from Albania to Italy at the narrowest point in the Adriatic? A round trip is gonna be what, an hour and a half? You could do three or four a day as long as the demand holds up!

And there's nothing in the Italian navy that's gonna get near you. True, they could blow you up good with a heat-seeking missile, but imagine the global headlines on that!

It'll never happen.

So I figure, as long as you have a fast enough fast-boat, you're good to go!

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