There I was, one eye on the computer screen and one eye on the Academy Awards. Then Barbara comes on and starts singing a song.
God, I want to see this... I reach for my glasses. I reach here and I reach there...
Where's my fucking glasses?
I run upstairs and check out all the usual glasses drop-spots around the commode...
Run down to the cellar and check around the furnace...
Oh my fu....
Oops. Just as I was about to put out an APB about my glasses, I reached up to itch my left eye... oh my God!!!
Ya, I was wearing my glasses the whole time.
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