Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Canada's Foreign Minister Baird in throes of mid-life crisis; accidentally brings peace to Middle East by embracing UN charter!

Well, that's better than embracing a teen-age hooker in the throes of your mid-life crisis, I suppose.

Today Baird informed the world that he was "appalled" to learn that a UN school in Gaza had discovered a rocket stash on the premises, and may have turned those rockets over to Hamas.

It's not exactly the best of times in Gaza these days, and I have a hunch that if such a thing happened, it may not have been an entirely consensual transaction.

But Baird, generally more inclined to piss on the UN Charter than to promote it, saw this as the moment to remind us of the sanctity of this document by quoting from Article 1;

Article 1 of the Charter of the United Nations states that the UN’s purpose is to “…maintain international peace and security, and to that end: to take effective collective measures for the prevention and removal of threats to the peace, and for the suppression of acts of aggression or other breaches of the peace, and to bring about by peaceful means, and in conformity with the principles of justice and international law, adjustment or settlement of international disputes or situations which might lead to a breach of the peace.”

Since Mr. Baird brought it up, let's have a closer look. Hmm... "take effective collective measures for the prevention and removal of threats to the peace?"

So I'm a little confused here... Sounds like Little John is going to speak out and condemn Israel's nuclear arsenal, the only one in the Middle East. After all, what could constitute a greater threat to the peace?

Does that mean he will lobby to have Israel sign the nuclear non-proliferation pact, as Iran has? Will he lobby Israel to join Iran in advocating for a nuclear-free Middle East?

Hey, I'm behind you 100% Mr. Baird!

And seeing you quote the bit about "principles of justice and international law" would seem to hint that, going forward, you will use your masterful powers of persuasion to convince your friends in Israel to abide by international laws, principles of justice, Geneva Convention, and so forth, ad infinitum.

Great news! You will go down in history as the man who brought peace to the Middle East!

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